30 things I wrote in 2023
A year of films, TV shows, art exhibitions, books, fallen stars… It all adds up.
I have read so many best-of lists and highlights of other people’s work over the past fortnight. Why not offer a few of my own? If anything, in the spirit of self-encouragement.
There are lots of skilled and valued writers on here who don’t have the numbers to show for it (yet). But as the old adage goes, not everything that counts can be counted and not everything that… well … you get the point.
Sending these curios and obsessions out like little paper planes across the aether. Catch!
Photography
“The clarity of vision in her experimentation is astounding, particularly when you consider how costly film was at the time. And Joan’s creativity was relentless: a plethora of techniques including making slides to project and shoot, double and triple exposing, sandwiching, double printing and using refracted light.”
Val Wilmer is one of the great chroniclers of black music history over the past 50+ years with both camera and pen. Her book As Serious As Your Life made a big impression. I went to view some of her archive at a small exhibition in Queen’s Park.
“Compassionate and curious, Wilmer’s 70’s encounters opened up the music to many. How, where and with whom it came to be. And that includes the underappreciated contributions of wives and partners. Her empathy for the struggle of black musicians – trying to earn a living in a prejudiced society – and reverence for each artist's will to express themselves with no compromises is evident from the first page of her introduction.”
“Cole wanted to be a doctor when he was younger but that all changed when a priest handed him his first camera in his teens. With education limited to preparation for labour and servitude, and townships being demolished, displacing thousands, he set to work amassing a comprehensive visual record of the black experience from multiple perspectives both young and old. And often at risk to his own safety.”
An exhibition of Top Boy portraits at Somerset House gave me a chance to consider what makes this show so compelling.
“At the centre of it all are two complex and compelling figures, vying for street supremacy, each ruthless and monstrous in their own way yet capable of compassionate gestures. Both occasionally motioning towards a different life, redemption on the horizon, but inevitably being pulled back into some badness.”
Film & TV
Look past the absurdity of the plot, if you have to, and The Banshees of Inisherin is a touching examination of friendship.
“The writer/director [Martin McDonagh] calls this his break-up film, which feels both neat and enticing. How often do we get to see two male characters contend with the absence of one another like this? The Banshees of Inisherin unravels complex emotions, sifting subtle nuance from the wreckage of this relationship.”
Indiana Jones cracks the whip again but can’t rediscover the old magic on his latest/last adventure.
“Being able to locate fissures in time is kind of a big deal, especially if you're trying to change history and win the war like Mads Mikkelsen's character Jurgen Voller. For me, this MacGuffin didn’t hold the same awe and fascination as the Ark of the Covenant, the Sankara Stones or the Holy Grail. I couldn't see the same hunger in Indy's eyes, either, despite him saying, ‘I've been looking for this all my life’.”
“It's hard for Thirteen Lives not to feel gripping and suspenseful, even if we know the outcome. But Howard's partly hands-tied approach plus his commitment to authenticity and realism (from VFX to tunnels, underwater sound and props) ends up making his ‘anatomy of a miracle’ feel more like a naturalistic documentary.”
“You still get that intense, combustive environment that keeps us on a knife edge à la The Bear. But now writers James Cummings and Dan Cadan have time to explore the lives of staff outside the kitchen. That makes a far more layered and intriguing viewing experience than director Philip Barantini’s vein-popping one-shot feature from 2021.”
“This primitive form of user-generated content is more than just a curious record of social history on screen. It also presaged the rise of cable television, the launch of Channel 4 with its more independent ethos, the Broadcast Yourself phenomenon of YouTube and what followed.”
“Leonard realised he could buy Pepsi points instead of having to drink to earn them (precisely 190 a day for 100 years, to save you the maths). PepsiCo saw it differently, pleading the defence of common sense. C’mon, it was clearly a joke, they said. But they forgot to add a disclaimer.”
Have you watched the TV series Dopesick? It’s a blood boiler about the OxyContin crisis in the US and the despicable greed of Purdue Pharma.
“My reaction was vehement and vengeful. I wanted to simultaneously shield the likes of haplessly addicted miner Betsy (Kaityln Dever) while smashing in the face of greedy Richard Sackler (Michael Stuhlbarg creeping us out) along with all his cronies.”
One for live-wire actor Tom Sizemore (Heat, Natural Born Killers, Bring Out The Dead, Black Hawk Down).
“Although he rarely achieved leading man status, he looms large over my 90’s movie childhood as this brash, cocksure and unshakable presence.”
As neither a father nor a spouse, I was curious about what drew me to Fleishman Is in Trouble not once but twice.
“The Hulu Original was adapted from a novel by Taffy Brodesser-Akner, whose NYT profiles of stars such as Val Kilmer have become the effusive gold standard. It appears to centre on pious Dr Toby Fleishman (Jesse Eisenberg) who is struggling to deal with his divorce from Rachel (Claire Danes), a status-obsessed, workaholic talent agent.”
Champion, a BBC show from author Candice Carty-Williams, was one of my favourite British TV series of the year, underpinned by a bangin’ original soundtrack.
“To take us into the heart of Lewisham borough (my home) and examine sibling rivalry in the music business over eight episodes through the lens of a fragmented British Caribbean family feels fresh, immersive and long overdue.”
“His brooding gaze could flick between compassion and menace in microseconds. His screen presence and pathos were off the charts. He could do simmering tension, like when Mouse comes to collect and pushes fentanyl on Roo. Sweet and awkward flirtation with Lexi on the couch. Or blind rage and retribution when he pastes Nate.”
Books
It takes us “from bedroom and kitchen bops, to dancehalls and school discos, to coming-of-age raves in Chislehurst Caves and The Civic in Orpington, to seminal club nights at the Hacienda and Sankeys Soap in Manchester, Heaven and Plastic People in London. Although written with candour and humility, there is also great generosity and optimism in these pages, right from the first line. We are told, unequivocally, that, ‘If you dance, you’re a dancer. This is where we begin.’”
“I read it last night – wholesome and very satisfying. Its A5 dimensions feel great in the hand and the editor in me is loving the playful approach to the stories. There's a languid ease to it all. Novelists feature a lot but in book-adjacent and unexpected ways.”
Music
“Going through some of my favourite De La Soul tracks and listening out for Dave in particular, I realised how nice he really was with the pen, but in a very low-key way, and mischievous with the wordplay too, which belied the message he transmitted.”
“When a swaying Majid opened his mouth and sung those first notes, I was astounded by his projection, filling the church and enveloping us in the most uplifting vibrations.”
A good music documentary should swell an artist’s sphere of influence in our minds and surprise us. Love To Love You did that for me with Donna Summer.
“Hits are great but they can limit you and skew how others perceive you. (Imagine not being paid your worth too 😞) I think there was this lingering impression of her in certain corners as an instrument or preset you could deploy in the studio. But no, we’re talking about a true artist (and a writer, is that acknowledged enough?), the kind that started out wanting to direct films and who would later turn to painting as another form of creative expression.”
“I have yet to encounter an album that sounds like Who Is Jill Scott? – futuristic yet grounded in its evocation of the soul, rhythm and blues and beat of the city. It all feels so real and visceral, even 23 years later as we finally get to hear that anniversary performance of the album in full. As Jill says, this moment right here happens only once.”
Art
“To you and I, feelings of awkwardness and embarrassment might be like hazard lights – and sign to tread carefully or think again. To Takala, there are confirmation that something is working. ‘And that is a skill I still use in my practice: my ability to resist social pressures and codes,’ she explains. “Some people know how to draw, but that’s the tool I use.’”
“Ayanfe’s practice helps her to understand where she comes from and to find her place in the world. ‘I can say that my art serves as a form of therapy for me when I’m scribbling. It's like building something from crooked lines, and by the time you’re done scribbling, you’ve formed something.’”
“A curious examination of the overlap between a portrait of the artist and one of radical African American composer Julius Eastman, who built scores of his “organic music” through experimental techniques of repetition and accumulation of fragments of phrases, followed by disintegration.
“We see how the arcade represented more than a place to doss about, while away the hours or gamble away a few quid. These were valuable meeting places and intergenerational community hubs. Culture, right.”
“I loved the way he [Bhupen Khakhar] would play with scale and perspective – the pictorial space – and there is an everyday warmth, dignity and down-to-earthness about the scenes he depicts, whether it's the watch repairers and other Tradesmen going about their day or Two Men in Banaras showing their affection for one another.”
“By reflecting darker and more taboo aspects of society back at us in this unabashed manner, Lucas is asking important questions about class, gender, morality and – gasp – the human condition. As you wander round the gallery, you may also ask yourself "Is this art?" and that's a good thing.”
Health & wellbeing
“The good doctor has been haunting my nights these past few weeks. It’s usually this way at the beginning of the year following Christmas, which is always challenging. I can’t remember the context of these dreams/nightmares. It’s just a void I flap and fidget around, searching and searching.”
“What makes this talk so vital is that he’s not trying to give a scriptwriting masterclass. This is about the importance of individuality and understanding that we each have something unique to offer the world, before we even touch a keyboard or pick up a pen. That is our starting point, our offering and an invitation to others to reveal who they are.” (full lecture)
“Curious people are among the happiest because they know there is always something interesting to notice, which gives them something to look forward to no matter where they are. They seek mystery in the everyday. You can too.”
Don’t miss: Have you seen my long read about Dear England, one of the year’s most exhilarating plays? It’s about Gareth Southgate’s impact on the England football team, which led me to consider the volatile relationship between the Three Lions, our national identity and collective pride.
The two that stood out for me:
Lucas’s Happy Gas Show, the reminder that...
"As you wander round the gallery, you may also ask yourself "Is this art?" and that's a good thing.” - this definitely was a great reflection for me to engage with is I think about my more darker poetry
I also loved:
“Curious people are among the happiest because they know there is always something interesting to notice, which gives them something to look forward to no matter where they are. They seek mystery in the everyday. You can too.” I love how reading another's work, prompts you to remember things about your own. You feel a sense of empowerment where what you need, is reflected back to you through another's words.
This is a theme I discuss a lot in my poetry, curiosity instead of judgement, I’d be interested to hear, what has a curious mind helped you with in your own life?
Up for some darker poetry. Anything specific you can point me to?
Curiosity feels like my engine at this point. It makes me feel quite self-sufficient (a good thing, in balance) and emboldens my spirit because I have this deep personal relationship with the things I am drawn to.
For all the anxiety I might feel about later life – fleeting opportunities for time with people I care about, for instance – or the sadness that lingers in place of departed family – focusing on the wonder around me is revitalising.
It might come from staring at the brush strokes of a portrait that looks ancient yet familiar. Listening to the way someone sustains a note and bends it on their guitar, which really deviates from the recorded version and you're thinking … what made them play it that way? Asking where an actor goes at a critical moment in a scene, their face almost transforming into a second character.
Endless ways to feel more present in the moment and and alive to the world, even when we are in receipt of the gifts of others instead of being the maker or provider.